Tuesday, August 29

Growlers and Upside Down Heads

I've recently become aquainted with the term 'growler'. I'm sure I've heard it before, but have never really considered it as an alternative name for the female genital region. Now, however, I am finding myself using this word more and more frequently, not just to describe women's nether-regions, but also as a sort of boredom mantra, a bit like Tourettes in reverse. In moments of extreme dullness the word just pops into my head, and then I have to say it to get it out; "Growler", I say (yes, I do think the capital 'G'), and instantly feel better. I know it's not particularly nice, and conjures up mental images of monster-like hairy openings with snarling teeth, but I honestly cannot help it. I am hoping it will end soon and I'll start on a more pleasant word.

Another thing I can't stop fixating on at the moment are upside down heads. I told James this on the phone tonight and he sounded baffled, he had absolutely no idea what I was talking about. "Upside down heads", I said, "you know, heads that'd look exactly the same if you turned them upside down than if you looked at them the right way up". Despite this more than adequate explanation he still sounded baffled. I tried a new tack, giving some examples of famous people with upside down heads, but I really think it's a phenomena that needs to be illustrated visually to be fully appreciated.


I don't have my photoshop loaded up on the Mac. If I did I'd have done a proper job on this, taken the head off the shoulders and turned it round, placing it back upon the shoulders and thus creating even more of a visual impact. But I couldn't so you'll just have to imagine the shoulders are at the bottom of the second picture. Also, Photobucket is going a bit weird and keeps turning the second picture back the right way up, which is very annoying, it might not be Photobucket anyway, there might be a Fred Elliot loving poltergeist living inside my laptop that is annoyed with my photographic tampering.

Bald men, obviously, are the best for upside down fun. This is because of the continuity of skin from chin to forehead. Men with beards also make good upside down candidates, providing they have a head of hair equal to the hair upon their faces (sparse hair and whispy beards work well, as do thick lustrous hair and massive beards).

If anybody else has any good photographs of upside down men then please let me know and I will post the best ones here for all to appreciate.


Stephen Collins said...

i never knew that rude word. I am not sure I like it. Oh by the way -you don't need to use photobucket on Blogger you know - provided you're using a blogger-friendly browser like firefox or explorer, you just click the picture icon in the compose window. I am baffled at what kind of arcane computer technology rights heads though.

James K said...

That doesn't look like a second head. It just looks like a normal head upside down. Your "upside down heads" are the biggest let-down since Orlando Bloom got captured by those fishmen.

Gem said...

Oh ye of little faith...

Do Google searches and that...