There were a few pleasant ripples in what was otherwise a washout of a day today. The journey to school was HORRIFIC, and I was forced to ride 4 separate Underground lines because of a 'person under a train'. Why would a person choose such an inconvenient time as rush hour to throw themselves under a train at one of London's busiest stations (Oxford Circus)? Actually, now I think about it, why wouldn't they? I have felt dangerously close to suicide several times on the way to work. Maybe one day I will actually do it and manage to piss off a few hundred bustling commuters in the process. Death and major annoyance; the phrase 'two birds with one stone' comes to mind...
The children were particularly exuberant after their half term break, and consequently more difficult to control than usual. To try and divert myself from giving up and sitting on the floor in protest at their behaviour I have begun mentally compiling a sort-of dictionary of all the terms they use in their silly W9 patois. I will share a few with you now:
Jokes: Funny. As in 'Remember when Abdul and Ryan had that fight? That was jokes!'
Butters: Ugly. As in 'Miss, so basically what you're saying is that Richard III was butters, right?'
Swag: Unusual. Quirky. As in 'Miss you're looking a bit swag today'. I was wearing bright pink shoes, a bright green cardigan and a yellow top. I deserved it.
Still haven't got to Westfield. I'm showing unusual restraint. However, I did find out that many of my students are now already hanging about there and referring to it as their 'yard' so it's probably wise not to go after all.
* My cat has an incredibly annoying habit of nuzzling underneath my hand and forcing me to stroke him while I type. If I refuse to cooperate he shoves his huge boy-cat face in front of the screen. He's doing it now. I feel cruel shooing him away. That's actually bollocks. I don't give a fuck. I just wanted you to think that I am kind to animals.